1st Grade!

Today was Addie's first day of school.

 She was excited but I could tell she was pretty nervous. She knows a few of the kiddos in her class from last year, I think that helped ease her mind a little.

 I cannot believe how fast our little girl is growing up. I am so thankful for her. She makes me crazy at times but I know she will do great things in her life. We love you Miss, have a wonderful year!

loss

Today is my due date for our third child...By this day we should have a little tiny baby to love and hold. Dealing with two miscarriages has made me realize that I suffer in silence. Most women with infertility issues do. People forget and move on...as they should, but we are left with a broken heart wishing things were different. There is no away to avoid it, no way around it...it is always there. I have 3 women that I know that were due with in 2 weeks of me. They have had their babies, it's another reminder that I will not have mine to hold...not on this earth. I know that there is reasons I have lost these babies...it doesn't take away the pain I feel inside. I know there will come a day that I will see those sweet faces...I cannot wait for that day!

It is so hard to explain to a young child why we lost our baby. Time after time she asks "when will it be our turn to have a baby?" What do you say to that? I know at times her heart hurts too. I am thankful for my sweet Addie, she brings so much joy and love to our home.

I hope and pray someday the Lord will bless us with a baby, until then I would love for Him to hold my broken heart.